“You are not too broken to find someone that actually wants you”

I recently read a line in a book that said, “You are not too broken to find someone who actually wants you.” At first, I didn’t think it applied to me because I don’t feel that way about myself. I’m not too broken. No one is too broken….

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about how I’ve been holding myself back by being overly logical with my emotions. My therapist once told me that I’m emotionally intelligent… this isn’t a compliment. I thought about it for weeks, and I realized that this is exactly the issue. I’m constantly too afraid to be vulnerable enough to fully feel my emotions; instead, I feel compelled to think them through.

I always believe I can’t afford to make mistakes, especially emotional ones. I’ve felt this way since I was a child, like I couldn’t afford to play emotional games. While this mindset has protected me in some ways, it’s also been emotionally damaging because I’ve never truly processed my feelings. How inhuman… I’ve essentially forced my human experience to resemble that of an AI, just not as fast.

There are so many things we think are impossible, but in reality, it’s often just our own minds convincing us that they are.